April 13, 2010

When "Talk" Went Out For A Walk


Talk Talked
Those were the days...on the occasion of Talk magazine's announced demise, refreshed by popular demand...

Talk talked, & Hearst walked,
Talk talked, & Miramax balked,
Tina & Ron's show has just gotten stalked
Their chat book now closed, over & chalked

Her cool editor's wit once ran loose & ruled
While the tough guy jestered, cajoled & fooled
Their hot buzz machine has ultimately cooled
Now critics & sharks are poised, perched and pooled

You could always tell Tina excited
When gossip was hot, she really delighted
But were high writer fees cause of the blighted?
To make Talk’s talk of success unrequited

Harry and Brown & Big & a Hottie
Sped in the fast lane, in Maserati
With chauffeurs frequently parked in the lobby
Their Bucko Buck options, now gone down the potty

Harvey’s idea to merchandise his movies
Was fine and dandy during Clinton era groovies
But did Bush & war and Afghanistan loonies
Bore Tina’s eye versus stories on Bloomies?

For Talk, Tina gave The New Yorker away
Now whose trash will she have to edit today?
Condé’s once fair princess is planning to stay
Though Hearst’s got the bills for a while to pay

Vanity’s bid price for juice to be soon halved & hacked
For street trash on rich folks getting richer or smacked
By their hubris & stupidity or arrogance shellacked
Could these seamy stories now get justly whacked?

Talk was Chic & sleek, though chic got piqued
Her Anonymous sources, & dark stories sneaked
The once ruler of '90s style inevitably reaped
In the end, no loyal readers, so nobody weeped!

Written by Tim McHale, somewhat different version was published in Media Life soon after Talk stopped talking.

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